Empowering Shy Kids: Practical Tips to Build Confidence

As a parent, you want to provide and support your child while they’re navigating growing up. This includes meeting their basic human needs, but also encouraging them to make mistakes, fail, pick themselves back up, and try again.

It’s important to find the balance to be there for your child, but also letting them figure things out on their own. If your child is on the shy side, you may be stepping in more than you may think.

Here are some practical tips to build confidence and empower shy kids.

Don’t Label Them

Be mindful of the words and phrases that you’re using to describe your child. Even if you’re speaking to a family member, friend, or neighbor in person or on the phone, your child may be picking up on these keywords and labels. If you refer to your child as being shy, they may be more likely to behave in a way that aligns with being shy. Try to be more mindful and find positive words and associations to describe your child and their behaviors.

Encourage Independence

Think of the age-appropriate tasks and responsibilities your child can help with around the house to build confidence on their own. Encouraging independence can help children work through potential challenges in a safe environment so that they’re likely to keep trying or failing until they succeed. Depending on your child’s age, these tasks could be activities like brushing their teeth, getting dressed on their own, setting the table, or cleaning up after themselves.

Show Praise

It’s important to know that you can’t always fix everything for your child. If you want them to grow, learn, and develop, you have to let them try to figure things out on their own. Encourage them to take steps to make decisions on their own by showing them praise. Pointing out these positive types of behaviors can encourage and motivate them to continue to showcase them.

Prepare Them

You can prepare your child for unfamiliar situations through role-playing. This allows your child to act out different situations and scenarios in a stress-free environment.

For example, you and your child could role-play as a cashier and a grocery shopper. This can give them real-life experience and ease some anxiety about being in a big place surrounded by people they don’t know. You can prepare them for social events by giving them a better idea of what will take place. You can try to explain where you’ll both be going, who will be there, some activities that may occur, and what time you may be heading back home.

Practice makes perfect. When your child is comfortable, they’ll be able to let that confidence shine through.

Be a Good Role Model

Your children are constantly watching you. Make sure that you’re being a good role model. Being mindful of how you talk to yourself and others is a great place to start.

Being a good role model also includes being supportive and empathetic towards your child, even if you may not exactly understand why they’re feeling a certain way. Make sure you’re having conversations with your child to show them that you also experience similar emotions and feelings.

Doing so can help validate them and make them feel like they’re not alone in these unknown thoughts and feelings they’re experiencing. When you talk to your children about these feelings, it can help them accept these feelings and realize that what they’re experiencing isn’t so scary.

Seek Additional Support

Just because you’re a parent doesn’t mean you’re expected to have all the answers. There are lots of unknowns and life lessons that come with parenting. Sometimes, one of the strongest things you can do is to reach out for additional support. A licensed and trained mental health professional will work with both you and your child to better support each of you while building your child’s confidence. Reach out today to get started with child counseling.